Just a friendly afternoon
by wufei hater
Summary: I really love to write humor, this one has most of the g-boys and a day on their off time. hehe


Just a friendly Afternoon  
  
  
I don't own gundam I don't pretend to either.  
  
  
As Milliardo and Heero are playing a game of Battleship, the world sifts by rather normally. Wufei is out on a Preventer assignment with Sally. Duo is watching TV; hooting and hollering every time he sees a food commercial, followed by him running into a kitchen to bother Quatre and Relena, and steal food from the dinner they are preparing. Trowa is off listening to a self-help tape on "how to make friends and influence people". It was one of those tapes that say something constructive then you would repeat it, only he would respond to it (as if it were insulting him) with an angry "…". Then consider throwing it out the window.  
It was one of Quatre's houses, emphasis on the, was. It now belonged to Duo. He came into ownership of it after he told Quatre that he dropped something into the toilet and refused to tell him what. After the whiny little brat went through a nervous breakdown trying to figure out what it was, he decided to be on the safe side and just give him the whole house.   
"Zero's telling me that B6 sunk your battleship? What's Epyon telling you?" Heero said in his most enthusiastic monotone tone of voice. "Zero's also telling me that I win again."  
"ALRIGHT QUIT IT NOW! It wasn't funny the first time when you told me in battle! It wasn't funny the last time when you sunk my Cruiser AND IT ISN"T FUNNY NOW YOU CRAZY LITTLE PSYCHO!" Milliardo yelled at Heero. "And I haven't used Epyon since you, repeat YOU, cut off its arm!"  
"You have a lot of emotional problems Milliardo." Duo said, his mouth full of stolen dinner.  
"That's not tonight's dinner is it Duo?" Milliardo asked.  
"It might be, it might not be. It's so hard to figure out exactly what is qualified as dinner these days; anything could technically be defined as dinner food. Why once I   
had…" Duo never got to finish as Milliardo pulled out a small concealed hand gun and had it jammed down Duo throat in mid sentence.  
"I'll ask you once, then we find out the hard way." Milliardo said cocking the gun in Duo's mouth. The chamber was just passed his front teeth. All he heard from Duo was frantic gargled pleas for his life. "If my damn sister, and happyface's damn girlfriend weren't in the next room. You'd be eating this bullet Maxwell."  
"She's not my girlfriend, she's your crazy sister, I'd kill her myself if I was, was…" Heero let the thought hang in midair. "Why don't I kill her? Why don't I?" Heero sat back in the chair looking dazed and confused, muttering "why don't I?"  
It was then that Relena came into the room, "Where's Duo?' she screamed "He's been eating the whole dinner! The only thing that's left is the turkey in the oven!" Seeing Relena at that moment and listening to her whining, again, finally pushed Heero over the edge. He took out his own handgun out from under the chair and shot at Relena. He narrowly missed hitting Relena and shot the wall less than an inch next to her.  
"For way to long I've had to listen to your incomprehensible babbling woman! JUST SHUT UP!" Heero finally yelled.   
The whole room was quiet for a moment, even Duo. He and Milliardo looked stunned from the wall, to Relena, to Heero, then back to the wall. Quatre came out of the kitchen after a few minutes. He looked like he was about to cry. "WELL YOU F***ERS FINALLY DID IT!" Fighting back tears. "YOU KILLED HER YOU FINALLY KILLED HER!" He said finally breaking down.   
"Uh Quatre?" Duo said. Relena's still here and very much alive, to some of our dismays more than others." Everyone kind of gave Duo a funny look and then just figured it was another of his idiotic ramblings and forgot about it.  
"Uh? What? No not her "her". HER!" He rushed out to the kitchen carrying a large turkey on a plate. A noticeable entry and exit wounds from where the bullet had mangled the turkey. "HER! She was beautiful! Glazed and plump, juicy and so tender." Then he looked back at Heero, who was still holding the smoking gun. "IF YOU'RE GOING TO SHOOT THIS WORTHLESS CHICK GO RIGHT AHEAD! BUT DON"T MAKE MY FOWL PAY FOR YOU INABILLITIES AS A MAN!"   
Everyone just dropped their jaws at what Quatre had just said. It just wasn't like the little wussy. Quatre ran over to Heero and took the gun out of Heero's hand then walked back over to where Relena was and pointed the gun at the side of her head. "FOR 49 EPISODES YOU COULDN"T DO WHAT I AM ABOUT TO DO NOT ONE!" And with that, squeezed the trigger again and again at Relena's head. But nothing happened. Everyone was really dumbfounded now. Especially Quatre.  
"Uh Quatre, remember when I put bullets on the grocery list and you either thought it was a joke or thought it was to violent and you didn't but any? Well with us having no jobs anymore how am I supposed to pay to get more." Heero said in a weak, and quite meager voice.   
Quatre just stood there for a moment then collapsed on the floor crying in pity. "But, but, but, I was finally going to be cool. It's not fair. It's Just Not FAIR!"   
"Uh guys on this sign shouldn't we be going now?" Duo asked to no one in particular.  
"Where would we go? Milliardo asked.  
"Pizza Hut should still be open, any objections?" No one had any of course. As anyone went out to there respective vehicles. Duo went back in to get Trowa and steal $50 bucks from Quatre.   
As Duo closed the door to the house he could still here Quatre mumbling "I just didn't want to look like a wuss anymore. I just wanted to do something cool."  
"And that my psychotic friend is why you always look so stupid." Duo said after he closed the door. As he walked over to the van that Heero, Relena, and Trowa were in, he pulled up near the door.  
"Hey Heero why can't I drive….  
  
To be continuedin Pt. 2  
Roadtrip to the Hut   
Please leave all e-mails constructive or deconstructive at swfanc@hotmail.com  
  



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